CELL PHONES

I have tha phone hook up. I don't have much, but I have phones. One in every room, caller id, three way calling, per line block, call return, anonymous call rejection. Cordless with speaker phone, I even have the head set,and that great invention. DIGITAL ANSWERING SYSTEM got it set for 4 rings. When it rings 4 times a normal person will leave a message. Not my people I come home from a hard days work. I pick up tha phone check my calls for tha day. ( Don shuff called 20 times, mom called 5 times. Someone from San Antonio -10 calls. Unavailable -10 times.)

I go to my room to check my messages ( I had to put it in my room ) I know who calls because I got caller id. I'll just call you back tomorrow. Damn 15 messages. 10 of these are from Don Shuff - this fucka here never says anything. For some reason he's always eaten when I answer his calls. All you hear are smackin sounds. Stupid little fuck. Mom always leave 911 call. ( Blackfoot----this is your mother,,,, I need to talk to you-------it's very important). This sounds bad I'm thinking some one died, brother is in jail, or one of my nieces are hurt I don't call right back, got to get my head right for this tragedy.--- mom you called me. ( yeah, how are you doin. You got any money.)

I pull out tha wallet, bam, boom, pow DAMN I cut my digital answering system off now. I'll call you when I call you. And Don Shuff, you punk, your only allowed one call a day. Smack that scrub.CELL PHONES we get off at 5'o'clock, of course Lil Ceez was late. As we stood in the door way of the shop, Lil Ceez ( in case yawl forgot lil ceez is my homie ) he took out his cell phone called his brother Sweets I laughed, Godzukie laughed, and Frank tha Wright thang was rollin. Why, because 2 feet away there was the shop phone. He know he don't have but 300 any time minutes, why waste minutes talking to Sweets for well let me tell yah.

Just like the rest of yawl, your showoffs, trying to look important. He used that phone thousands of time. Oh, I know must have been a girl passin bye, and damn that phone 2 feet away had a cord on it. And this is the year 2000. ( can't let them see me use a phone with a cord on it. ) what I don't get is when you leave or going in your apartment why use the cell phone and you idiots who use your cell phone while driving. That's dangerous fool I was walkin across a parking lot. This stupid fool almost hit me ( I had the right away )- looked at me like I was wrong. If your dumb ass drive, and put that damn cell phone down, maybe you would have seen me.- you know what think most of yawl be frontin anyway.

Most of yawl probably are not talkin to any one. Every Mercedes, Volvo, or BMW I see pass. There always on a damn cell phone ( fake, fake, fake. ) - and for you people who have those head sets, you look crazy, like your talkin to yourself.

FAT AND SKINNY AT THE SAME TIME

Some people are skinny, some fat. Of course you have that muscles ( guy/dude/homey/damn showoff ). But I'm talking about fat and skinny. So you say, what's FAT AND SKINNY AT THA SAME TIME? Well let me tell yah, fat and skinny is when you have a big belly and skinny arms and legs, when your pant size is 34, and you get a 38. YEAH IT'S ABOUT ME just like this page. Were I talk about what I talk about when I'm by myself You heard me, 6 years ago I was 135 pds. Just skinny before I started my current job. After all those buffays ( all you can eat for 6.99 joints ), drinking all them forties ( icehouse ) computer and my favorite thing that damn playstation I know I'm taking to long, I'm ahead of schedule I was going to watch the Bernie Mack Show but, something called baseball was on ( damn ), now I'm fat and skinny. Any way people started saying man your getting fat.

I paid it no mind. I stepped on the scale, I was a 170 pds. I did not notice that my belly was getting large, the only thing I notice was these skinny arms and legs. About 3 weeks ago, while sitting on my bed I glanced in my mirror. My belly was huge, like my chest was caved in. My stomach was stickin in out from front and side, ( no love handles ) my belly was over lapin my shorts I mean I was eating a ham and boloney sandwich at the time. I wake up, put on my close, at about 9.30 my pant get a little loose, I tighten the ole belt. All mourning long I'm playing tug of war with my pant. There's a place were my pant wants to be right under the belly.So now I'm walking around with my pant cocked. Low in the front high in the back. It isn't until after lunch ( the ole buffay ) that my pant fits right. The tummy full, pant fit right, and all is well. Until about 2:30 here we go again (tug-tug-tug )